My daughter is boy crazy already!

[msomnipotent]

She is only seven! And even worse, the boys are just as girl crazy! She gets letters from several of them. I will post the two recent ones because I think they are funnier than hell.

1.

Dear Emily,
Are you coming to my house or am I coming to your house? are you going to call me? well we have to have it on saterday because we are Bisy on Sunday. Don't call me I'll call you. oh and Don't Forget 2+2+4 and 1+1=22. Just so you know.

2.
Dear Emily I hope you can train your dog? Dear Emily is your dog a puppy or kid or Adlut? Dear Emily is your dog friendly or not friendly? Dear Emily do you want a playdate with me?
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I think I prefer bachelor number 2 because at least he was smart enough to inquire about the viciousness of our dog before heading over here. Oh, and he asked nicely instead of telling her "Don't call me, I'll call you"! What happened to today's youth? Boys were icky and gross when I was 7, and they all had cooties. I knew I would be beating them back with a stick at some point, but not this soon!

At least this is distracting her from her current crush, which is the guy from Jurassic Park that is now on that show Alcatraz. Just thinking about her crushing on a grown man makes my teeth itch.

[Sniper-T]

http://i192.photobucket.com/albums/z203/omg_its_leelee/icons%20and%20junk/cooties.png

Ground her!

for the next 11 years

[realist]

All my daughters "friends" were afraid of me, I don't know how they got that way. However that was just fine with me. Now she is 15 and she will tolerate the boys but she is just happy to continue playing sports. I see several boys have an interest but they keep their distance. I am not sure if it is me or if it is because she can shoot better than most, play sports better then most and studies Muay Thai and can kick their ass. I'm happy now.......

[mollypup]

Both my girls still think boys are really icky. I totally agree with them and tell them how smart they are!

[izzyscout21]

Application for Permission to date my Daughter

Note: Please be prepared to submit additional information, e.g.; DNA swab, psychological test results and submission to Polygraph.

1. Name: ____________________________ D.O.B: _______________________
2. Height: ___ft ___in Weight: ________ I.Q.: _______ G.P.A: _____________
3. Social Security #: ______________ Drivers License #: ____________________
4. Home Address: __________________________________________________ ___
5. How fast can you run 100 yards: ______sec, 2 miles: ________ minutes
6. What Church do you attend: __________________________________________
7. Are your parents still married: __________ Would they miss you: ___________
8. In 50 word or less explain what Don’t touch my Daughter means to you:
__________________________________________________ __________________________________________________ __________________________________________________ __________________________________________________ __________________________________________________ ______________
9. In 50 words or less explain what I own several guns and know how to shoot, and I also have a shovel means to you:______________________________________ __________________________________________________ __________________________________________________ __________________________________________________ ________________________________________________
10. Complete the following sentences:
A. If I were to be shot the last place I would like to be shot is in the __________
B. In the unfortunate event of my untimely death, I would like my ashes scattered: _________________________________________________
C. My greatest fear is: _________________________________________
D. The one thing I hope this application does not ask is: _______________
11. What do you want to be if you grow up: _______________________________
12. Have you ever been fingerprinted: ________ Had your teeth X-Rayed: ______
13. Do you have any identifying marks e.g.: Tattoos, birth marks, piercing: _______
(If YES, please explain and give location)________________________________
__________________________________________________ ________________

I hereby swear that all the information I have provided is accurate and complete to the best of my knowledge under penalty of being beaten to death by the father of the girl you are inquiring about.
Signature: __________________________________ Date: ______________________

Thank you for your interest, please allow 6-8 years for processing. You will be contacted in writing if you are approved to date my daughter. Any attempt by you to contact or communicate prior to being accept will result in extreme pain and discomfort on your behalf.

[Katrina]

Izzy,may I copy this and give it to one of the guys at work ? He is proud pappa of 3 girls

[izzyscout21]

have at it

[Gunfixr]

Our daughter is 13 and still not impressed with boys at all.
Which is just fine by me.
But then again, I think the only person on the planet she fears is me, so she'll probably be alright.

[ladyhk13]

I was 16 and my dad was picking out who I was allowed to go out with (with a parent present). Needless to say I didn't date. I pissed him off one time and got grounded until I was 40 - no joke. I didn't speak to him for 2 weeks until he gave in and made it only 2 months. Now that he died this past year I would do anything for him to ground me again.... big sobs...

[IDTANDY]

I was fortunate my only daughter had 2 big brothers,they did the screening and handled the problems.:D

[LUNCHBOX]

Izzy, I couldn't help it.
Application for Permission to date my Daughter

Note: Please be prepared to submit additional information, e.g.; DNA swab, psychological test results and submission to Polygraph.

1. Name: _Mr. Nice Guy___________________________ D.O.B: ____________10 yrs b4 her___________
2. Height: __6_ft __1_in Weight: _____210___ I.Q.: __what_____ G.P.A: _____who________
3. Social Security #: _____123-45-6789________ Drivers License #: _________BR549_________
4. Home Address: _________________under a bridge___________________________________
5. How fast can you run 100 yards: ____why__sec, 2 miles: _____where___ minutes
6. What Church do you attend: ________is there a bake sale__________________________________
7. Are your parents still married: ____not sure______ Would they miss you: ______miss who_____
8. In 50 word or less explain what Don’t touch my Daughter means to you:
_____________________________wait til your not around____________________________________________ __________________________________________________ __________________________________________________ __________________________________________________ _________________________________________
9. In 50 words or less explain what I own several guns and know how to shoot, and I also have a shovel means to you:____________________you bury your brass__________________ __________________________________________________ __________________________________________________ __________________________________________________ ________________________________________________
10. Complete the following sentences:
A. If I were to be shot the last place I would like to be shot is in the __ass___B. In the unfortunate event of my untimely death, I would like my ashes scattered: __________on your cereal_______________________________________
C. My greatest fear is: ___you catching us_______D. The one thing I hope this application does not ask is: ________what is love_______
11. What do you want to be if you grow up: ___________older____________________
12. Have you ever been fingerprinted: __finger what______ Had your teeth X-Rayed: ___I had a cavity___
13. Do you have any identifying marks e.g.: Tattoos, birth marks, piercing: _piercings, alot of them______
(If YES, please explain and give location)_____everywhere__________________________ _
__________________________________________________ ________________

I hereby swear that all the information I have provided is accurate and complete to the best of my knowledge under penalty of being beaten to death by the father of the girl you are inquiring about.
Signature: ___your daughters boyfriend_______________________________ Date: ____anytime__________________

Thank you for your interest, please allow 6-8 years for processing. You will be contacted in writing if you are approved to date my daughter. Any attempt by you to contact or communicate prior to being accept will result in extreme pain and discomfort on your behalf.

[Sniper-T]

^
On your cereal!

bwahahahahahaha

you shoulda answered 'finger-who'?